August 18th, 2009

elijah bear

(no subject)

Good morning my friends!
Thank you so much for your lovingly words, virtual gifts and support. It was a great help for me the last days. I'll come back to every single one of you, you can be sure.

When we saw him on Monday the last time he looked very peaceful as he would only be sleeping. This gave peace back to my mom, too.
After the memorial service last Tuesday he finally came home on Thursday.

I don't know why but I couldn't even cry so far, maybe it's because God did what was the best for him and for my mom. His one and only love was my mom and before she left him when she visited him the last time - he looked at her, as if he would like to take her picture with him to the place where he is now. A much better place, without pain, without suffering anymore.

My dad's life wasn't easy, not at all. At the age of 9 he lost his father, at the age of 12 he lost his mother. The was no place for him at his sisters but finally he found peace and joy in his family. He always had to work very hard but I never missed anything. I remember when I was 5 years old I got my first little green bicycle - for this he had to work at a brewery for about 4 weekends carrying huge barrels (he told me about this few months ago). I still own this little bike, I even polished it the last days.

What I miss the most is his smile, seeing him sitting in his garden on a huge bench, glasses on his nose and reading, his laughter and his voice. He isn't here anymore but he'll always be in my heart.

I love my dad, always did, always will.

I took last week and  this week off to spend some time at my mom, just to be there for her. That's what I want to do, that's what my dad would like me to do for her.
I'll be back here in a few days - again to all of you, my heartfelt thanks. Without friends like you it wouldn't be possible to be that strong.

Love and hugs to all of you,


elijah bear


Look what my roomie Wolfgang got for me!
Aren't these two girls cute? I'm looking for names for them, any suggestions?
At the moment they are glued to my legs and I'll take them later with me to my mom - they love it there and she loves them as much as I do :-)

elijah bear


Goodness, three posts today and it's only 8.30 a.m.!!!
What keeps my upright even at this time is writing. Not a single day passed that I didn't write at least 3 or 4 lines. Letters most of all - fanfiction a little bit, too. As my dad would say "The show must go on" - more than true.
So be prepared that I'll post a lot the next days.

For my beloved f-list.
This little something I read to my dad 4 weeks ago, now I polished it and maybe you'll like it.

Title: Nothing and everything
Pairing: Reader's Choice
Rating: G

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